retrogradeworks:

This is how fucking stupid you sound when you say, ‘No homo.’

retrogradeworks:

This is how fucking stupid you sound when you say, ‘No homo.’

(via ellietheasexylibrarian)

exeunt-pursued-by-a-bear:

erikloser:

stop taking bucky’s metal arm away

stop taking charles’ wheelchair away

stop taking clint’s hearing aids away

disabled superheroes are important stop sucking please

I read this wrong and I was just picturing them all confused as to who keeps taking their stuff.

"Steve have you seen my arm anywhere?"

"Nope, sorry Bucky.  By the way, have you seen Clint’s hearing aids?  He hasn’t been able to hear a damn thing all day"

(via ellietheasexylibrarian)

embarrassmental:

narcotic:

what if people named their kids when they turn 18 so the kid has a name that fits its personality

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(via pizza)

johnlockinthetardiswithdestiel:

bill-holmes:

tardis221b:

teacupsandnetflix:

It cracks me up when the actors on a show are also the producers because I always picture them casting themselves like

"Who’ll play the main character? Ah yes. Me."

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sorry but

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u can’t beat the monuments men

umm excuse u

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don’t mess with the Polar Express

(via ellietheasexylibrarian)

Anonymous said: omg if baby oil dissolves condoms what the fuck does it do to babies???

the-kellin-under-the-vic:

This may be shocking, but babies and condoms are made of different material

thewomanfromitaly:

durnesque-esque:

daeneryus:

shutupaubrey:

princesschloepea:

life tip whatever dumb ass name you get siri to call you is what your iphone automatically signs your emails as. i have been applying to jobs for 2 months as queef.

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#OH MY GOD OH GMY GOD OH MY GOD NO N ONO NO NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOO #HOLY SHIT #I HAVE BEEN APPLYING TO JOBS AS ANAL DESTROYER

Goddess of All Worlds

if true, this is the best thing i’ve ever read

(Source: princessblogonoke, via squishysound)

the-fandoms-are-cool:

fantasticbeastmovie:

the-fandoms-are-cool:

can we please talk about this

1998 is a hard year for jackie # even working two jobs money is tight # (especially with rose’s gymnastic lessons # but rose loves them and jackie will sell her own kidneys to ensure she can keep attending) # and christmas is just around the corner # she looks over her books and feels ill: # she simply can’t afford to get rose any proper gift this year # and it breaks her heart # because rose is so excited # she loves christmas # keeps saying how she hopes it’ll snow this year # proper like # and christmas eve jackie is up late # worrying and hating how disappointed rose is gonna be come morning # when she wakes up to see the floor is almost empty beneath the tree # and that’s when there’s a knock at the door # she opens it # (with a baseball bat at the ready - it’s late on the estate after all) # and there’s no one there # just a red child-sized bike # with a note attached # 'she's gonna be fantastic' it reads in messy loopy handwriting # 'merry christmas' # and normally she’d be worried about weirdos and stalkers but tonight # tonight it’s christmas eve and jackie tyler knows when not to look a gift horse in the mouth # so she hauls it inside quiet as she can # and the next morning when she’s awoken by the sound of rose crashing her new bike # into the hallway mirror # shrieking in delight the entire time # she takes a moment to say a silent thank you (via)

and now I’m crying

(Source: mickeysmth, via ellietheasexylibrarian)

princeburrito:

"The Flicking Candle Company"

lol clever clever clever use of name AND font.

(Source: odditymall.com, via ellietheasexylibrarian)

skylinegiraffe:

that-weird-lady:

congenitalprogramming:

psychosexuality:

unbridledlearning:

thewomanfromitaly:

outofstratford:

FIFTY SHADES OF GREY || OFFICIAL TRAILER

You’re fucking joking

ewwwwwww

Look how they tried to make this abusive piece of shit sexy. 

Ugh.

After this shit is released, expect a flood of expecting subs who don’t know that it’s abuse and more fake Doms preying on them. 

Yep. A flood of defensive posts, a flood of drama, a flood of exuberant basement dwelling shitdicks given new fuel in their predation. A flood of fucked up shit all around, a flood of teenaged girls who will grow up romanticizing this sort of thing.
Yaaay.

Please just be one movie and not a trilogy so we can just sweep it under the rug later

This is a gross representation not only of love and sex but BDSM too. That relationship is not healthy and if anything BDSM relationships have to be healthier than others because you have to trust each other more. I’m thoroughly disappointed.

(via ellietheasexylibrarian)

WHEN MY MOTHER ASKED IF I HAD A PLAN FOR MOVING ALL MY BOOKS

cptnsexy:

engrprof:

dukeofbookingham:

I was like:

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Go to the liquor store and ask for empty boxes.  They are the right size and thickness for books.   Anything much bigger and you can’t pick them up.

And you can get liquor while there. 

(via ellietheasexylibrarian)